Monthly Archive: March 2015

Thursday

26

March 2015

0

COMMENTS

TBT – What if the first black president were a Republican?

Written by , Posted in Culture, Politics, Race

 

Based on an article from theGrio in 2012.

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Our country has been engaged in a national dialogue on race since the election of the nation’s first black president in 2008. Barack Obama’s supporters and opposition have both been accused of being motivated primarily by race, but one topic that has not been discussed is what factor race would have played if our first black president was a Republican. A deeper analysis of this issue reveals a great deal about the prisms through which we see race and politics in our culture.

The degree to which race would impact the country’s acceptance of a black Republican president would depend on both policy and personality. A black conservative president would fashion a cultural and political reality almost completely contrary to the one created by Barack Obama’s presidency. White conservatives would be some of the black president’s most ardent supporters, while black progressives would be among his fiercest critics. One only need consult the chapters in the black conservative playbook that pertain to race to understand why.

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Thursday

26

March 2015

0

COMMENTS

#TBT – What Makes a Man Husband Material?

Written by , Posted in Relationships

 

Based on a Black and Married with Kids (BMWK) article from 2011.

According to Urban Dictionary the term “wifey material” is a phrase used to describe a woman who possesses certain qualities that would make her a model wife. I’m sure many men would describe this type of woman as a perfect mix of style, substance, sass, and love””or at least respect””for sports. Aside from that, men appreciate her kindness, supportiveness,  and caring nature. She’s the type of woman who could turn a serial player into a one-woman man.

Urban Dictionary has no such definition for “hubby material,” however, and the definition for “husband material”, a guy you would consider perfect enough to marry one day, is so self-explanatory it’s almost laughable. Generally speaking, there’s relatively little dialogue about what makes a man husband material, aside from the standard responses that include some combination of appearance, stable employment and steady income.

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Friday

20

March 2015

0

COMMENTS

A Fragile House

Written by , Posted in Entertainment, Politics

 

Be careful what you wish for.

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The missus and I recently finished the third season of House of Cards and are already ready for more. The show consistently brings to the screen the best (or worst) of what people like about political dramas. Frank Underwood is calculating, manipulative, power-hungry and ruthless. He is, in many ways, to politics what Sun Tzu was to military strategy—equal parts philosopher, strategist, and tactician. He believes that power is more important than moneya concept he thinks most people in Washington still don’t get.

Claire is the only person on the show who even comes close to matching Frank’s combination of ambition and ruthlessness. Theirs is a relationship unlike what we are accustomed to seeing from fictional power couples. One of the things that really stood out in the first two seasons was the ease with which they accepted relationships outside their marriage. We’re accustomed to seeing wives of powerful men grudgingly endure their husband’s infidelity but we’re certainly not used to seeing the openness with which the Underwood’s share their extramarital affairs. In fact, the couple’s affairs prior to season three were shown to be both physical and strategic in nature.

Sex and sexuality were key themes in the first two seasons, and not just for the main characters, but season three was much different. Sex didn’t seem to play nearly as important a role, especially for the main characters. The Underwoods’ relationship in season three is characterized by distance–both literally and figuratively. If the first two seasons were characterized by people looking to acquire things–power foremost among them–the third season seems to be more about people trying to hold things together, whether party unity, sobriety, self-image, or relationships. Frank and Claire spent the first two seasons trying to get where they are in season three, but they demonstrate that sometimes the things we want in life bring problems we don’t anticipate. The third season of House of Cards proves that scaling the mountain requires a different set of strategies than staying on top of it.

Thursday

19

March 2015

0

COMMENTS

#TBT – Are You Really Ready For A Relationship?

Written by , Posted in Relationships

 

Based on a Black and Married with Kids (BMWK) article from 2011.

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I recently had a conversation at a friend’s birthday get-together that I felt I just had to share. It started when one of the women there responded to a compliment on her outfit by saying, “Well, that’s one of the perks of having a cheating boyfriend.”

As you could imagine, I was curious to know why she would say something like that. She said that her boyfriend was a serial cheater, but his six-figure income and lavish gifts helped her look past his indiscretions. While she admitted that she had also been unfaithful, she certainly didn’t seem satisfied with her situation and talked about her desire to be in a relationship with someone who actually treated her the way she felt she should be treated. Her statement didn’t come as a surprise, but that entire conversation revealed something about her that is true of many people who say they want to be in a relationship: She. Was. Not. Ready.

Our culture suggests that relationship-readiness is determined by some combination of education, job security, and physical attractiveness. Those factors are indeed important, but they are only one piece of the puzzle. There are many other aspects to being ready for a relationship, and I believe every person should ask themself  the following four questions to determine whether they are really ready.

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Monday

16

March 2015

1

COMMENTS

A Fool in Genius’ Clothing

Written by , Posted in Culture, Politics, Race

 

Being a brilliant surgeon won’t stop you from sounding like a clueless politician.

Carson speaks to the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) in National Harbor, Maryland

(Credit: Reuters/Jonathan Ernst)

Ben Carson has been the talk of conservative circles ever since he delivered a speech at the National Prayer Breakfast in 2013 that many saw as critical of President Obama. In case you didn’t know, Dr. Carson is a retired brain surgeon of international renown. He is also the author of a book about how to “save America’s future”, a frequent guest on Fox News, and 2016 presidential contender. Ben Carson is a man who is now more relevant for his political commentary and presidential run than his expertise in medicine. That’s unfortunate because he has little to offer to the former but still seems to draw credibility from his career in the latter.

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Thursday

12

March 2015

0

COMMENTS

#TBT – On Interracial Dating

Written by , Posted in Relationships

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Today’s #tbt is based on a article I wrote for Black and Married with Kids in 2010.

I was involved in a recent convo on FB that started when one person stated that some successful black men have to date outside the race because black women don’t them. It’s a line I’ve heard in the past and is often accompanied by the charge that black women aren’t interested in the clean-cut studious guy and instead want a ’round-the-way roughneck. I made the point that some of the guys who feel they’ve been slighted probably overestimate their value on the dating market. Given the familiar stats on young black men when it comes to h.s. graduation, unemployment, incarceration, it’s easy to be a black man with a college education and a stable job, to look at your peers and inflate your sense of self. You look in the mirror and think that any sane black woman should jump at the chance to date you. And while being financially stable is a very good thing, it doesn’t replace your need for personality and charisma, both of which impact chemistry. So when you run up on a sister and she’s unimpressed with your degrees and job (probably because she has her own), you might jump to the conclusion that she’s looking for a roughneck when in fact she just wants a guy who can make her laugh.

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Monday

9

March 2015

1

COMMENTS

Pilot

Written by , Posted in Culture, Politics, Race, Relationships

 

For years I felt something was missing from the political discourse and social commentary I heard on a regular basis. Guests on shows were much too predictable, more likely to parrot talking points than acknowledge the complicated nature of serious social and political issues. Then two years ago I saw a segment on one of my favorite shows that eventually led me to start this blog.

Allow me to set the scene.

President Obama went to Chicago in February 2013 to to deliver a speech on strengthening the economy for middle-class Americans. His address came shortly after Hadiya Pendleton, a 15-year-old girl from Chicago, was shot and killed one week after performing at the president’s second inauguration. What was supposed to be a speech on the economy ended up being remembered by many for what the president said about gun violence, marriage, and strong communities. POTUS stated that no law or set of laws can prevent senseless acts of violence and talked about the shared responsibility communities have to love and support their children. Then the president went a little deeper. (more…)